As I sit here typing this, I’m eating Ruffles potato chips. I’ve been wanting to start this site up for many months, but haven’t been able to get with the program (not the web part, that’s easy, but the actual healthy part). I had another site, a Wordpress blog called “Losin’ It!”, a number of years ago to chronicle my journey to get healthy and lose weight. It was very short lived. It was still up until my hosting account got hacked and I ended up deleting everything and putting only the relevant stuff back up. I still have the content, so, maybe I’ll add some of that in later.

I plan on documenting my journey from going from a fat bastard to a FORMER fat bastard. The only thing I won’t be able to do, that I wish I could, is do a large battery of tests to have some good starting numbers. But, money is the limiting factor here. I will be able to do some statistics. I can do blood sugar, blood pressure and weight and I have some blood test results from a recent doctor’s visit.

The very first time I learned about diet in a way that made sense was in the late 90s. I was watching TV at 2am because I worked a job with horribly insane hours. So, even if I didn’t work that day, I might still be awake in the middle of the night (not anymore, thank God). I saw an infomercial for Protein Power by the Doctors Michael and Mary Dan Eades. It was the first time I ever heard diet explained scientifically (notice I said diet not ‘a’ diet. Big difference). I bought the program and jumped right into it. It was easy. Eat this, don’t eat that. I had no problems doing it - at least, at first. Over time, I snuck in a little of this junk and a little of that crap. After six months I was sliding back into the abyss. Not sure how long it took, but I had put on the 30 pounds I had lost and continued on up from there. Many starts later, and I’m a very fat bastard. And depending on how much crap I eat in a short time, I almost can’t function. Physically or mentally. That’s where I am right now.

Joint pain. Muscles that ache all the time. When I do almost any time of physical task, I feel kind of like I have a lactic acid burn all over. ALL OVER! My whole body wants to just lock up and not move. Horrible brain fog. I try to focus on something and…. SQUIRREL!….. Or I just find myself daydreaming.

One of my worst issues is eating while I’m driving. I always want to be popping something in my mouth while I’m on the road. And it’s usually Peanut M&Ms and Ruffles potato chips.

Apparently, my brain has convinced me that I try to stop eating sugar (and grains) I’ll die, or at least be miserable (like I‘m not now). Intellectually, I know this isn’t true, because I’ve done it before - many times. I don’t get the keto flu or go into convulsions in the corner. But my brain seems to be telling me there will be grave consequences if I try to deprive it of it’s fix.

I know there’s an element of an emotional issue here, too. I recently noticed it. I’d eat crap when something bad happened, or I was angry, or even if I was happy/celebratory. You can read more about this on the About Me page.

So, I’m starting early. Before I’ve actually started the journey to being a Former Fat Bastard. This time it had better last forever……